“Friendship is a serious affection, the most sublime of all affections, because it is founded on principle, and cemented by time.” Mary Wollstonecraft
Anyone who knows me knows the importance of friendship in my life, those that I value and care for. Now I know there’re some people who think I have a lot of friends, I really don’t, I just know a lot of people. I take the word friend so seriously, because friendship is so valuable to me. The people who I have as friends, I try to treat them as best as I can. I know there’ll be days when I slip, when maybe my depression hits and I may forget and it seems like I’m distant, but I want all my friends to know that I love them and care for them so much.
I’ve had friends ask why I go so “out of my way” sometimes for them, and honestly that’s not how I see it. I’ve had my days when I’ve felt uncared for and unloved and I never want the people in my life to feel like that, even if they already have a million people showing them love, I’ll still show them love, because feeling unloved and unwanted is a very painful feeling.
From my personal observations of people, I realize that love and affection is so rare now, that there’re a lot of people who feel unwanted and aren’t regularly told how important they might be to someone. While it’s important to understand and know the value of yourself, realistically speaking, we all still want to know that we’re important and cared for by the people we hold near and dear to our hearts. My question is, when did showing affection become a negative thing? Why is hugging and really being there for your loved ones in a public space seen as embarrassing? We’ve become a people who crave attention and affection but don’t even give it. No one is saying we need to always physically be there either, sometimes a simple check in message or just calling to say hi can mean so much and brighten a person’s day. We’ll be so quick to say we need genuine, loving and loyal people in our lives, but sometimes we need to watch ourselves and see if we are that same thing to those we have in our life.
“Friendship – that mutual affection and companionship between people – is arguably one of the most important aspects of life.” Ann Williams
One thing I’ve been feeling a lot these days is that I’m running out of time. One of my greatest fears is losing the people I love and care for. A couple weeks ago I went to bed early and actually managed to fall asleep, but when I started to dream it quickly turned into a nightmare. I dreamt I was stuck in a small glass room in a much larger white walled room, and everyone I love was in the room. But the glass was really a one-way mirror, so I could see them but they couldn’t see me, and while I was screaming for them, one by one they each started to disappear, and I was trapped and all alone, I lost everyone I cared for. Needless to say, I didn’t go back to sleep. But since that dream, I realized we really don’t have long in this place and one day I will lose everyone I love, hopefully not all at once like in my nightmare, but eventually it will happen. Our lives will change and we’ll grow apart or the one above will take us back to him, and being honest, while it’s a part of life, it absolutely terrifies me. Every day I see those quotes that say, life’s short so live it how you want, but what about caring for the ones in your life too. Because life is short and we need to put true value in the people in our lives. Sometimes maybe admit we could be a bit selfish at times even, maybe expecting things from them, thinking that we have forever with them, when we don’t.
“For friendship is a gift from God wrapped up in human form, sent down to show us what He’s like. For in God was friendship born.” Kitty Chappell, Friendship: When It’s Easy and When It’s Not
Friendships and overall bonds in your life are so important. According to the mayoclinic.org, friendships and strong human bonds can increase your sense of belonging, boost your happiness and reduce stress, help you cope with traumas and encourage you to make positive change. These bonds that we have with people are so crucial in living a healthy life. No one wants to live a life alone; we all deserve love and affection. So, don’t be afraid to hug your friends and family, to say I love you to someone, to tell a friend how much you appreciate them in your life, to spend time with someone whose company you enjoy, to ask the questions, to admit your feelings, lord knows we don’t have long on this earth, don’t let that time catch up on you or them.